A word of caution for female tourists visiting Egypt: be careful of the many of the men working in tourist areas in Egypt.
Although the vast majority of Egyptians have a high sense of honor and good conduct, it seems that tourist areas seem to attract a relatively high concentration of people with lax morals, who would exploit tourists in many ways. It can manifest itself as persistent aggressive begging, peddling cheap goods, charging 10X the normal prices for services and goods, and what this article focuses on: exploiting female tourists.
Looking at the bulk of the comments on my notes on compulsory army service in egypt they are mostly from non-Egyptian women who married (or intend to marry) an Egyptian man, and army service has become an obstacle.
So, once you here the word "habibti" (meaning "my love" in Arabic), and before you call him "Habibi", let alone go down the marriage route, read on below for more information.
The exploitation happens in many forms, but is normally centered around one of the following:
Easy and Free Sex
Many tourists come from countries where sex is more freely practiced outside of marriage. Youn g Egyptian men working in tourist areas who
are not married see this as an opportunity, and are met with acceptance from the female tourists.
A source for Money
Many Egyptian men who practice this scam view the "wealthy" tourist as a source of income. They keep asking their "girl friend", "fiance" or "wife" for money for various excuses, just like a professional scammer would play a confidence game on a victim.
An Opporunity for Immigration
Some of those men want to get out of Egypt, and see their marriage as a way to gain residence and citizenship in a Western country. The economy in Egypt has been stagnant for decades, and poverty, lack of opportunity and the high cost of marriage lures some youth to trying these tricks.
Why it works?
There are several factors that work in favor of the Egyptian scammers here.
One factor that helps is that most Egyptian men look desirable to Western women, being of darker complexion than their compatriots. The fact that the foreigners are white blonds work in making the women attractive and desirable for Egyptian men.
Another factor is that the woman is coming to the tourist place to have a good time. It may be a break from stressful work or study, or perhaps a past relationship. This helps blind her to what is happening.
Yet another factor is the cultural differences which also create temporary blindness.
Moreover, those workers being away from their village or city of origin, where they would be observed by their extended family and friends tend to make it easier for them to engage in sexual relationships and scams without being scrutinized by acquaintenaces, and no stigma is attached to these behaviors.
Finally, the scammers have perfected their techniques over the years, and are very skillful at what they do.
Blacklists
Blacklists have emerged on the internet, to warn potential female tourists from known exploiters. These have all the faults of user contributed content on the internet in that they can be innacurate, biased, or even rigged by rivals or pranksters. However, in the absence of any other information, they can be useful, provided they are taken with a good deal of skepticism and research and common sense applied.
- An overview article on what a "black list" is, at Arabia.pl.
- Dezy House: Blacklist for Hurghada, in English.
- Dezy House: Blacklist for Sharm El Sheikh, in English.
- Wanted List of Egypt.
- Egyptian Blacklist on Topix.
- KunstKamera blacklist.
Happens everywhere, not only Egypt
Before someone gets the impression that Egypt is a cesspool, and Egyptians are crooks, let me say it is neither.
The problem above is not limited to Egypt by any means. Any country where tourists come in to spend money has its share of exploiters. The above black lists have a Turkish one, and a Tunisian one, and there are lots of stories about French, Italian and Spanish men exploiting women tourists as well.
Of course, there is also the Russian bride fraud targeting well to do men in the West.
So, the problem is universal, although this article focuses on female tourists to Egypt.
Final Thoughts
There are many non-Egyptian women married to Egyptian men happily, so over-generalizing from the cases mentioned, or from workers at tourist resort is wrong. Chances are you will be happy with an Egyptian as a husband if you met him in a more natural settings, e.g. while studying or working, and getting to meet his family as well.
The "artificial" environment in resorts, being on holiday, and surrounded by some scammers lend itself to the disasters described.
So, beware ...
Further Reading
- Marwa Rakha: Relationship Warning: Do not get involved with Egyptian Men (also here).
- Global Voices: "Beware of Egyptian Men" says Canadian Embassy, also by Marwa Rakha.
- Trailing Grouse: Egyptian men marrying women for money.
- Yahoo Answers: Egyptian Men marrying foreign women to get out from Egypt.
- Sex, Sun, Stupidity and Gigolos.
- Amy Robson: n English girl who keeps falling in false love with Egyptian men (she finally returned to Britain).
- Someone searching on KunstKamera: for Honest Egyptian Boys?
- List if sites on Romance Fraud in German, and other languages.
- A movie documentary in the making on holiday romance, specially Hurghada.
- Female Sex Tourism on Wikipedia, has lots of links to extensive articles. While Turkey is listed as a major destination, Egypt, Tunisia, and Morocco are listed as "minor destinations".
- An article from a Canadian perspective: Sex tourism in full boom. Jamaica, Barbados, Dominican Republic and the Caribbean are the major destination for Canadian women.
Comments
Anonymous (not verified)
Too much is said about men
Sat, 2011/10/29 - 20:28Too much is said about men cheating women on this site. I go to swimming pools in the Upper Egypt area and the sight of some of the women that have married young Egyptian men would be shocking to anyone. These women are not far from being in a nursing home. Their husbands are in their 20s and 30s and handsome by any standard. If a young man is going to get a million pounds for marrying and having sex with one of them even one time then he should rightfully keep the money. Think to yourselves, if this woman was such a great catch for her money then why didn't she marry an English guy? Answer - Because they don't want her with or without the cash.
Anonymous (not verified)
LOL! The thing is, I'm a
Sat, 2011/11/05 - 12:05LOL! The thing is, I'm a catch myself, I didn't go to Luxor to find me a young husband, I'm fit, goodlooking, and have many English guys I could date, but I chose an Egyptian. I have in fact many male friends over there I have made over the years, that just sleep with any woman they can get money or gifts off, and watched them at play in the clubs, but each to their own eh! I promised my B.F that I would not be in contact with them, as it looked bad on him, so I've been a bit of a twathead for being too trusting! Obviously from the lady above's info, it looks like I'm being made a twat of, and more fool him, cos when I go back next month, he won't know what has hit him, literally!!!
Isis (not verified)
To LOL - are you a different woman?
Tue, 2011/11/08 - 01:23Hi there - not sure if you are the same woman that I have been talking to or another of this creep's conquests.
Because you are a catch is precisely why he won you over. He's not going to waste time on someone without money and who is plain looking. He constantly needs an ego boost. A word of advice - if you propose to end the relationship please ensure you are staying somewhere where he can't get to you as some of these men don't relish being confronted and you may see a threatening side to his personality.
Good luck.
Anonymous (not verified)
Thank you Isis, I don't think
Tue, 2011/11/08 - 11:37Thank you Isis, I don't think I shall return, he has been texting many times a day, we were supposed to be heading to Hurgada in December, but I always book late, and he started to get very stressed, he will book the apartment (yes, I would pay....) saying how could I leave him for so long, we should marry next time I am there, and its wrong what I have been told that he can have 2 wives, as he is a Coptic, and the church does not allow it! I have worked very hard for my business and home, and I'm just beginning to start the rest of my life now, as I've just sold the business, so I don't need any kind of fraudster taking me for a ride, and it looks and sounds like I nearly have been! He was a virgin till he met me, he waited to find the right woman, he does not want an Egyptian girl, he has to pay the court, government, college, his work is limited due to less tourists, he needs a laptop, mobile, D.J equipment, my God, I sound like a desperate idiot, but I can promise you I am not! I socialise with groups of people who are mainly in the law field, and they told me I was being naive, and not to part with any money. We even have our photos up in families homes, as they thought I was bright enough to know that I was not being used and this was a genuine relationship! So, I thank you once again, and put this as an experience to warn others about, and it does not matter if you are attractive, young, blonde, slim, etc, it can happen to anyone!
Khalid
Severe all ties to him ...
Tue, 2011/11/08 - 11:48This is clearly a scam. He would milk you for all that he can, then move on to the next victim.
You are naive to think that there is any commitment here, neither emotional, nor marriage.
Stay away from him. Stop replying to him, block his SMS.
If you decide to come back to Egypt, don't even tell him, nor meet him. Go to another destination.
Any, for all that is sacred, please come to Egypt to enjoy the weather, beaches, corals, history, ...etc. Don't come for a man.
It is a recipe for disaster.
Isis (not verified)
I am sorry for you
Fri, 2011/11/11 - 14:52I am so sorry that this whole episode has caused yu so much grief and reality can be earth shattering. He wants to change his lifestye and live off women and can see nothing wrong with this perception. He has told you that he does not want an Egyptian wife but I am 99.9% sure that he will already be married to an Egyptian and she was hidden when you visited his family or was introduced as a sister or a cousin. He thought that he was on a good wicket with you. Regading the being a "virgin" - I doubt it!
On the other hand, it is refreshing that you have realised that he will not destroy your life. You have worked hard for what you have and he his not entitled to one pound of the rewards for that hard work. He hard work is scamming women day in and day out. You are not an idiot - you are smart and wordly. Put this experience behind you and don't answer his texts or messages. I will give him the evil eye for you the next time I am at the Nile Palace.
Best wishes.
Mahmoud (not verified)
to all women
Sun, 2011/11/06 - 20:23Dear all,
many of the stories up there are really sad, and while reading some of them I feel like I want to vomit and feels so angry myself...
but what happened has happened in most of the cases, 2 things I want to say:
1- if you ever thought of travelling to Egypt or any where on the earth as a tourist, then be it, be a tourist and don't start over a relation, most important don't start a relation with someone who is serving YOU
2- if you have been used before, please transfer number (1) to all your friends so that no one will be fooled again.
one last thing, make sure your report any stupid action by any guy to the hotel management, that at least will save others.
good luck to all.
Tom (not verified)
re: telling your story
Fri, 2011/11/18 - 16:10I'm researching a documentary film about the pitfalls that some people encounter when travelling to some countries. I would like to speak with any women who has been victimized by these young Egyptian men. It is more of a cautionary tale rather than judgmental story. If you are willing to speak with me off the record please email me and I will contact you. It could be helpful to alert others who travel. Thanks. Tom P Montreal
Misha (not verified)
Email to where Tom?
Fri, 2011/11/18 - 20:06You didn't include an email?
Tom (not verified)
re: telling your story
Sun, 2011/11/20 - 20:57I forgot to include my email. If anyone is interested in telling me her story about getting involved with a young Egyptian man who ultimately seemed only to be after her money, please contact me at tpuchniak@gmail.com. I'd like to speak with you off the record for a documentary film on which I'm working. Thanks. Tom Puchniak Montreal
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