A word of caution for female tourists visiting Egypt: be careful of the many of the men working in tourist areas in Egypt.
Although the vast majority of Egyptians have a high sense of honor and good conduct, it seems that tourist areas seem to attract a relatively high concentration of people with lax morals, who would exploit tourists in many ways. It can manifest itself as persistent aggressive begging, peddling cheap goods, charging 10X the normal prices for services and goods, and what this article focuses on: exploiting female tourists.
Looking at the bulk of the comments on my notes on compulsory army service in egypt they are mostly from non-Egyptian women who married (or intend to marry) an Egyptian man, and army service has become an obstacle.
So, once you here the word "habibti" (meaning "my love" in Arabic), and before you call him "Habibi", let alone go down the marriage route, read on below for more information.
The exploitation happens in many forms, but is normally centered around one of the following:
Easy and Free Sex
Many tourists come from countries where sex is more freely practiced outside of marriage. Youn g Egyptian men working in tourist areas who
are not married see this as an opportunity, and are met with acceptance from the female tourists.
A source for Money
Many Egyptian men who practice this scam view the "wealthy" tourist as a source of income. They keep asking their "girl friend", "fiance" or "wife" for money for various excuses, just like a professional scammer would play a confidence game on a victim.
An Opporunity for Immigration
Some of those men want to get out of Egypt, and see their marriage as a way to gain residence and citizenship in a Western country. The economy in Egypt has been stagnant for decades, and poverty, lack of opportunity and the high cost of marriage lures some youth to trying these tricks.
Why it works?
There are several factors that work in favor of the Egyptian scammers here.
One factor that helps is that most Egyptian men look desirable to Western women, being of darker complexion than their compatriots. The fact that the foreigners are white blonds work in making the women attractive and desirable for Egyptian men.
Another factor is that the woman is coming to the tourist place to have a good time. It may be a break from stressful work or study, or perhaps a past relationship. This helps blind her to what is happening.
Yet another factor is the cultural differences which also create temporary blindness.
Moreover, those workers being away from their village or city of origin, where they would be observed by their extended family and friends tend to make it easier for them to engage in sexual relationships and scams without being scrutinized by acquaintenaces, and no stigma is attached to these behaviors.
Finally, the scammers have perfected their techniques over the years, and are very skillful at what they do.
Blacklists
Blacklists have emerged on the internet, to warn potential female tourists from known exploiters. These have all the faults of user contributed content on the internet in that they can be innacurate, biased, or even rigged by rivals or pranksters. However, in the absence of any other information, they can be useful, provided they are taken with a good deal of skepticism and research and common sense applied.
- An overview article on what a "black list" is, at Arabia.pl.
- Dezy House: Blacklist for Hurghada, in English.
- Dezy House: Blacklist for Sharm El Sheikh, in English.
- Wanted List of Egypt.
- Egyptian Blacklist on Topix.
- KunstKamera blacklist.
Happens everywhere, not only Egypt
Before someone gets the impression that Egypt is a cesspool, and Egyptians are crooks, let me say it is neither.
The problem above is not limited to Egypt by any means. Any country where tourists come in to spend money has its share of exploiters. The above black lists have a Turkish one, and a Tunisian one, and there are lots of stories about French, Italian and Spanish men exploiting women tourists as well.
Of course, there is also the Russian bride fraud targeting well to do men in the West.
So, the problem is universal, although this article focuses on female tourists to Egypt.
Final Thoughts
There are many non-Egyptian women married to Egyptian men happily, so over-generalizing from the cases mentioned, or from workers at tourist resort is wrong. Chances are you will be happy with an Egyptian as a husband if you met him in a more natural settings, e.g. while studying or working, and getting to meet his family as well.
The "artificial" environment in resorts, being on holiday, and surrounded by some scammers lend itself to the disasters described.
So, beware ...
Further Reading
- Marwa Rakha: Relationship Warning: Do not get involved with Egyptian Men (also here).
- Global Voices: "Beware of Egyptian Men" says Canadian Embassy, also by Marwa Rakha.
- Trailing Grouse: Egyptian men marrying women for money.
- Yahoo Answers: Egyptian Men marrying foreign women to get out from Egypt.
- Sex, Sun, Stupidity and Gigolos.
- Amy Robson: n English girl who keeps falling in false love with Egyptian men (she finally returned to Britain).
- Someone searching on KunstKamera: for Honest Egyptian Boys?
- List if sites on Romance Fraud in German, and other languages.
- A movie documentary in the making on holiday romance, specially Hurghada.
- Female Sex Tourism on Wikipedia, has lots of links to extensive articles. While Turkey is listed as a major destination, Egypt, Tunisia, and Morocco are listed as "minor destinations".
- An article from a Canadian perspective: Sex tourism in full boom. Jamaica, Barbados, Dominican Republic and the Caribbean are the major destination for Canadian women.
Comments
Hannah (not verified)
FGM
Fri, 2010/09/24 - 12:41Khaled, we have christian friends in Luxor, and my husband asked two of the son's if they would marry a woman who was not circumcised, we were shocked that the answer was no. When reading of this practise, we were under the impression that it did not happen among the christians, but it seems it does in upper Egypt. My husband comes from Cairo and his sisters also had it done, because the grandmother said they would never find husbands if they didn't, her reasoning is that it takes away the sexual desire for a woman and therefore she will not stray. It is true that laws have been passed to stop it, but if families cannot find a doctor who will do it, then the local midwife will, look up the recent case where a doctor was arrested because the girl died.
Khalid
FGM is an African practice
Fri, 2010/09/24 - 12:52There you have it ...
It is an entrenched custom among some sections of society. It will take time to eradicate.
FGM is mainly an African practice, and it has made its way to Egypt at some point. As I said, it transcends religious boundaries, despite the fact that Western media and activists often associate it, wrongly, with Islam. You will find it in countries in Africa where there are no Muslims.
You will also find it not practiced in Muslim majority countries to the East as well.
Also, having a midwife do it in unsanitary conditions opens up more risks of infection, sterility, ...etc.
Lee (not verified)
Thank you for your
Fri, 2010/09/24 - 18:46Thank you for your replies.
It is abhorrent to us in the West but I understand that it is a cultural practice usually performed by women on young girls as it is deemed necessary for marriage.
Once again, the responsibility for male sexuality is put upon women and to prevent women from enjoying sexual pleasure, thus ensuring their fidelity to their husbands.
My question remains, if the vast majority of Egyptian women are unable to enjoy sex (and I am presuming that the much-maligned men employed in tourist areas are from the uneducated rural class where the women are most likely to be circumcised) what impact does that have on men?
My thoughts are that this problem can only be eradicated when the men (who have the power and control in much of Egyptian society) start to demand uncircumcised women who have the ability to participate on equal terms.
Perhaps Western women are the way forward .... in that respect at least because surely sex is better with a fully functioning female as God intended her to be.
Khalid
Don't see it
Sat, 2010/09/25 - 01:03I don't see it the way you put it.
The custom is entrenched not because of male anything. It is just because things have been that way, and hence continue to be so. Again, it is like things that look foreign to outsiders, just like arranged marriage, or abandoning an elder left to die.
Despite Hannah asserting my position that both men and women agree on this custom, you still think that men are deprived because the women are cut. How can that be the case when men are quoted above as not thinking of marrying uncircumcised women?
This is a colonial view of how things should be changed. Change in society is slow and has to take its pace, but will eventually happen. Shock treatments are seldom successful. They leave traumatized generations.
By the way, I see an unhealthy feminist streak here too. Why is it that there is no call for abolishing male circumcision? I have seen medical doctors who assert that the cutting of males leave them with far less sensory nerves than an uncut male, and hence cannot enjoy sex like them. But I don't see the over activism weeping for the oppressed Muslim and Jewish men who have to suffer this to the same extent I see feminists taking the cause against FGM, and blaming it on males and/or religion.
Anonymous (not verified)
I live in Luxor. The capital
Sat, 2011/11/05 - 15:19I live in Luxor. The capital of female circumcision. The practice is illegal but the families get round the law by signing a document taking responsibility from the doctor for any mishap. The women are the main perpetrators of this operation. They seem to do it to justify having had it done themselves. I have spoken to many men in Luxor about it, including my husband who had a disasterous marriage to a cousin who had had the op and he told me sex was horrible, painful for her and led to a quick divorce after just one month. All the men I have spoken to agree that it makes sex very bad for them. They dont like it and don't agree with it. This is one of the main reasons they men want a foreign wife. it is not the money or the visa as you would like to think, it is the chance to have a decent sex life. I know many really nice guys that would love the chance to meet a western girl, not to take her money and not an old lady either. They also find Egyptian women are dirty and boring since they have no interests outside the home. I always point out to them too that there is no point in expecting a woman to convert to Islam as they may as well have an Egyptian wife if they want a woman to wear an hijab and the genuine ones do not expect that either. So there are many reasons why Egyptian men hit on western women and sometimes it can mean love, sex and happiness.
Lee (not verified)
"The custom is entrenched not
Sat, 2010/09/25 - 02:43They have not always been that way but it is thought that the practice, both male and female circumcision, began in Egypt in Pharoaonic (sp) times as a way of excising either the male or female part that was thought to exist in both sexes. So I would ask why that practice, which obviously causes a great deal of pain and suffering, persists? This leads to the argument that it is now used to control women's sexuality, and therefore, by proxy, men's. Who benefits from this practice?
I really don't know and that is why I'm asking the question. I would have thought that sexual enjoyment for men would be greater if their wife has the same pleasure but if men will not consider marrying uncircumcised women perhaps this is not the case?
Yes it will as more people become educated and aware This is not about colonialism, this is about human rights and needless suffering.
I disagree - sometimes shock treatments are the most effective, they compel people to action rather than complacency. And what is more traumatising than having your genitals removed?
It may be your view that feminism is "unhealthy", but feminist thinking seeks to abolish the oppression and subjugation of disempowered people (not only women) to prevent unnecessary torture and suffering and to dispel inequalities. I see that as healthy!
Moreover, there are campaigns to prevent male circumcision, especially for non-medical reasons, as in the US and UK. Many men resent the removal of their foreskins in that they were not given a choice and feel disfigured as a result. However, the comparison is not equal; a Type 3 FGM is equivalent to the removal of the head and a third of the shaft of the penis. The WHO estimates that between 100 and 140 million women worldwide have been subjected to FGM. If the equivalent had happened to men, do you think this practice would continue?
barbar (not verified)
i want to marry a woman italian is a good
Sat, 2010/09/25 - 16:22this is my profile
Name : AbdelKader mohamed refaiy
Nickname : BarBar
Nationality : Egyptian
Marital Status : Single
Body Type : Average
Smoking : Non Smoker
Drinking : I don't drink at all
Race : middle eastern
Education : holds a Diploma Cars
Religion : islam
height : 158 c.m.
Weight : 58 k.g.
Cell phone : 002 0109461577
E mail : almonaface@yahoo.com
Address : Quseir city , Red Sea Governorate , Egypt
Anonymous (not verified)
I met a Egyptian man in the
Mon, 2010/09/27 - 20:23I met a Egyptian man in the Sunrise Island View Resort in Sharm el Sheik and thought he was lovely. He was a waiter in the restaurant and his name was Mosad. He is 30 years old and from the city of El Mahalla, El Kubra in north Egypt. I have been seeing him since January 2010 and have travelled to Egypt many times to be with him. But today I find out he has been having sex with an Egyptian Waitress in the same hotel on a regualar basis. Aparently, quite a few of the Egyptian waiters pay to have sex with this waitress and he is no different. I have also learned today that he has conned older English women out of money and even stole goods from one Russian lady who was on holiday in the same hotel.
He has boasted about stealing money from guests who come to sit in the restaurant, as he classes himself as a professional pick pocket. To all tourists who may be taking a holiday now or in the future in this hotel, beware!.. He is the only egpytian waiter in the restuarant named Mosad. Dont be fooled by his polite manner or charm,.. instead watch your bag, pockets in trousers or jackets.
Hannah (not verified)
What a strange name, I
Tue, 2010/09/28 - 17:12What a strange name, I thought the mosad was the Israeli secret service. My husband thought this was funny, maybe you have spelt his name wrong. Are you sure it isn't Mousa?
Khalid
Not strange
Tue, 2010/09/28 - 17:30The issue here is that there are certain consonants that exist in Arabic (and many other Semitic languages) that have no English equivalent.
The Mosad name would be the latinized form of مسعد, and is better transliterated as Mos'ad (or in instant messaging speak mos3ad).
The ع is the Semitic 'Ayin.
The Mossad on the other hand, does not have this letter in them.
Both get reduced to the A and hence the confusion.
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