Canadian Humor: Top 10 Reasons to Live in Newfoundland

I like the motto for your website... "The journey for wisdom starts with knowledge".

Obviously you do not follow this motto because you are displaying sheer ignorance.

Yeah, stupid, not even funny. There are plenty of good newfie jokes.

p.s. Newfoundlanders are almost as racist as Albertans.

Top ten reasons to live in Ontario
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1. You live in the center of the universe.
2. Your $400,000 Toronto home is actually a dump.
3. You and you alone decide who will win the federal election.
4. There's no such thing as an Ontario Separatist. Separate from what? You are the centre of the universe.
5. Your grandparents sold booze to the States during Prohibition.
6. Lots of tourists come to Toronto because they mistakenly believe it's a cool city.
7. The only province with hard-core American-style crime.
8. Much Music's Speaker's Corner - rant and rave on national TV for a dollar.
9. Baseball fans park on your front lawn and pee on the side of your house.
10. Mike Harris: basically a sober Ralph Klein.

Top 10 reasons to live in Ontario
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1. You live in the center of the universe.
2. Your $400,000 Toronto home is actually a dump.
3. You and you alone decide who will win the federal election.
4. There's no such thing as an Ontario Separatist. Separate from what? You are the centre of the universe.
5. Your grandparents sold booze to the States during Prohibition.
6. Lots of tourists come to Toronto because they mistakenly believe it's a cool city.
7. The only province with hard-core American-style crime.
8. Much Music's Speaker's Corner - rant and rave on national TV for a dollar.
9. Baseball fans park on your front lawn and pee on the side of your house.
10. Mike Harris: basically a sober Ralph Klein.

there is a difference in "laughing with" and "laughing at" This site is dumb!

1. The poorest, stupidest, drunkest province in Confederation
Me - That is what we want you to think... That why you wont see us coming when we take over the world! (So far we have haft of Canada)

2. If Quebec Seperates, you will float off to sea
Me - If Quebec separated... Hahaha... right. Quebec separating.. that's the best joke ever!

3. In the rare case when someone moves to the Rock, you can make them kiss a dead cod
Me - Which proves that fact that a Newfoundlander can make you do just about anything!

4. The economy is based on fish, seafood, and fish-related products
Me - Which puts us in good with Japan... Plus we get our fish for CHEEP CHEEP CHEEP!

5. If you do something stupid, you have a built-in excuse
Me - " I spent too many years on the main land!"

6. You understand the meaning of Great Big Sea's lyrics
Me - Lukey's boat is painted green, what idiot can't understand that. Lukey has a boat. It is painted Green. Really. How hard is that?

7. The work day is about two hours long
Me - Cause we are that hard of a worker. We can get done in Two hours what it takes any main lander 8 hours to do!

8. You are credited with many great inventions, like the solar-powered flashlight and the screen door for submarines
Me - as well as the the world's first artificial ice arena and the gas mask (something tells me a Fish plant worker came up with that one). Oh and there is no Such thing as a Screen door for submarines. It's an Old Navy Joke!

9. If someone asks if you're from Nova Scotia, you are allowed to kick them
Me - But Of course! We are allowed to dump them in fish guts of they ask if we are from Ontario!

10. It is socially acceptable to wear your hip waders on your wedding day
Me - Damn right! Sexiest things going! NOT! That's only on the Red Green Show!

Alright.. I'm from Newfoundland as well, and we are quite capable of taking jokes. If we weren't we wouldn't make jokes about ourselves. As anybody would find, it's offensive hearing these things come from somebody else who has probably never even been on this island. I bet if you ever came here, and got to meet some of the people here you'd take a second thought about what you wrote. And maybe you don't mean any offense to what you are saying. But if that's the case you shouldn't be posting it all over the internet for people to laugh at and agree with. Simply keep in among you and your friends.

Best people I've ever met are from Newfoundland and that's b/c they can make a joke, take a joke. Bit surprised by some of the "sensitive" people but truth is...best laugh is one at yourself, so yeah, only Newfies should make fun of Newfies and women should only make fun of women and etc... (I'm serious)

I'm from Saskatchewan and I love the Newfie Jokes. However, I've heard most of them before. They were aimed at the Ukranians. It doesn't matter where you live in the world you'll find a lot of the same jokes aimed at different people. I know that Newfoundlanders aren't any dumber than anyone else. I think they just like you to think they are. They are very hard workers, smart and most of them can take a joke about themselves. I get jokes about being from Saskatchewan all the time. So what if I'm considered a hillbilly, everyone has something. Lighten up!