A word of caution for female tourists visiting Egypt: be careful of the many of the men working in tourist areas in Egypt.
Although the vast majority of Egyptians have a high sense of honor and good conduct, it seems that tourist areas seem to attract a relatively high concentration of people with lax morals, who would exploit tourists in many ways. It can manifest itself as persistent aggressive begging, peddling cheap goods, charging 10X the normal prices for services and goods, and what this article focuses on: exploiting female tourists.
Looking at the bulk of the comments on my notes on compulsory army service in egypt they are mostly from non-Egyptian women who married (or intend to marry) an Egyptian man, and army service has become an obstacle.
So, once you here the word "habibti" (meaning "my love" in Arabic), and before you call him "Habibi", let alone go down the marriage route, read on below for more information.
The exploitation happens in many forms, but is normally centered around one of the following:
Easy and Free Sex
Many tourists come from countries where sex is more freely practiced outside of marriage. Youn g Egyptian men working in tourist areas who
are not married see this as an opportunity, and are met with acceptance from the female tourists.
A source for Money
Many Egyptian men who practice this scam view the "wealthy" tourist as a source of income. They keep asking their "girl friend", "fiance" or "wife" for money for various excuses, just like a professional scammer would play a confidence game on a victim.
An Opporunity for Immigration
Some of those men want to get out of Egypt, and see their marriage as a way to gain residence and citizenship in a Western country. The economy in Egypt has been stagnant for decades, and poverty, lack of opportunity and the high cost of marriage lures some youth to trying these tricks.
Why it works?
There are several factors that work in favor of the Egyptian scammers here.
One factor that helps is that most Egyptian men look desirable to Western women, being of darker complexion than their compatriots. The fact that the foreigners are white blonds work in making the women attractive and desirable for Egyptian men.
Another factor is that the woman is coming to the tourist place to have a good time. It may be a break from stressful work or study, or perhaps a past relationship. This helps blind her to what is happening.
Yet another factor is the cultural differences which also create temporary blindness.
Moreover, those workers being away from their village or city of origin, where they would be observed by their extended family and friends tend to make it easier for them to engage in sexual relationships and scams without being scrutinized by acquaintenaces, and no stigma is attached to these behaviors.
Finally, the scammers have perfected their techniques over the years, and are very skillful at what they do.
Blacklists
Blacklists have emerged on the internet, to warn potential female tourists from known exploiters. These have all the faults of user contributed content on the internet in that they can be innacurate, biased, or even rigged by rivals or pranksters. However, in the absence of any other information, they can be useful, provided they are taken with a good deal of skepticism and research and common sense applied.
- An overview article on what a "black list" is, at Arabia.pl.
- Dezy House: Blacklist for Hurghada, in English.
- Dezy House: Blacklist for Sharm El Sheikh, in English.
- Wanted List of Egypt.
- Egyptian Blacklist on Topix.
- KunstKamera blacklist.
Happens everywhere, not only Egypt
Before someone gets the impression that Egypt is a cesspool, and Egyptians are crooks, let me say it is neither.
The problem above is not limited to Egypt by any means. Any country where tourists come in to spend money has its share of exploiters. The above black lists have a Turkish one, and a Tunisian one, and there are lots of stories about French, Italian and Spanish men exploiting women tourists as well.
Of course, there is also the Russian bride fraud targeting well to do men in the West.
So, the problem is universal, although this article focuses on female tourists to Egypt.
Final Thoughts
There are many non-Egyptian women married to Egyptian men happily, so over-generalizing from the cases mentioned, or from workers at tourist resort is wrong. Chances are you will be happy with an Egyptian as a husband if you met him in a more natural settings, e.g. while studying or working, and getting to meet his family as well.
The "artificial" environment in resorts, being on holiday, and surrounded by some scammers lend itself to the disasters described.
So, beware ...
Further Reading
- Marwa Rakha: Relationship Warning: Do not get involved with Egyptian Men (also here).
- Global Voices: "Beware of Egyptian Men" says Canadian Embassy, also by Marwa Rakha.
- Trailing Grouse: Egyptian men marrying women for money.
- Yahoo Answers: Egyptian Men marrying foreign women to get out from Egypt.
- Sex, Sun, Stupidity and Gigolos.
- Amy Robson: n English girl who keeps falling in false love with Egyptian men (she finally returned to Britain).
- Someone searching on KunstKamera: for Honest Egyptian Boys?
- List if sites on Romance Fraud in German, and other languages.
- A movie documentary in the making on holiday romance, specially Hurghada.
- Female Sex Tourism on Wikipedia, has lots of links to extensive articles. While Turkey is listed as a major destination, Egypt, Tunisia, and Morocco are listed as "minor destinations".
- An article from a Canadian perspective: Sex tourism in full boom. Jamaica, Barbados, Dominican Republic and the Caribbean are the major destination for Canadian women.
Comments
Anonymous (not verified)
Question
Tue, 2012/10/23 - 21:16THere are some hotels that will let you stay.. and men can come to visit.. More so the american owned chain ones.. and there are some apartments too owned by foreigners.. but there are some that are very strict about men visitors.. i wish i could have your email and then i could tell you more details so as to not get the establishments in trouble.. but the ones that let you are nice ones, good areas, clean and tidy and reasonable rent.. dont despair.. google google google and be straight with them.. good luck
Isis (not verified)
Staying in Hotels
Thu, 2012/10/25 - 20:40If Hotels let unmarried couples (Egyptian male and Western woman) stay w/o the appropriate papers then they are breaking Egyptian law and no foreign owned hotel chain will want to upset Egyptian law and enforcement. The local police are notified of all non-Egyptian guests. Landlords are required to pass this information on also. Don't be fooled that you have/will escaped the bureaucratic scrutiny. I advise not to take any risks in this area.
Anonymous (not verified)
is a lie, dear, maybe he just
Sat, 2013/02/16 - 09:54is a lie, dear, maybe he just want to have some extra-money from you by cheatting you about the real rent....it was happened to me, too...
Anonymous (not verified)
egyptian husband
Sun, 2012/12/30 - 15:55I am british and more than 2 years ago married my egyptian husband (a full legal marriage in Cairo) we met in Sharm and I have spent time living with his family in Beni Suef. It hasnt been easy learning new ways but it can work and I think it has made our marriage stronger. Unfortunately because of the situation and lack of jobs I have had to return to the UK. We talk every night on skype and I try to go to see him every 2 or 3 months. I would love him to come to work in UK but the government have really clamped down on visa requirements that it is almost impossible. The only people who will be able to get visas are rich people so Im afraid it will be more rich single women being targeted by bad egyptian men. A lot of the guys my husband works with talk freely about money they are making from these women and have 2 or 3 on the go, they tell him his stupid being with me as I have no money and to find someone else, so this makes him really sad. I hope we will be together soon as we are very much in love.
Anonymous (not verified)
Hi, is your husband a Muslim?
Mon, 2012/12/31 - 09:14Hi, is your husband a Muslim? And because you married in Cairo, does that mean he can still take a second Muslim wife? I hope you are in a good trusting relationship, and then your love will prevail anyone elses spitefulness.
Anonymous (not verified)
Distraught in Germany
Mon, 2013/01/07 - 14:24As the title says I am Still Distraught in Germany. From my previous posts you may recall that I did not know if to stay in Germany with my English Boyfriend or to go to Egypt to be with my younger lover.
I made an unannounced visit to the resort where my lover works and found that I am not the only one who he has been seeing. I was ready to leave my life in Germany and move to Egypt but just needed clarification of my lover’s feelings. Sadly all the warnings have come true, I found that he was not in the resort as he had told me he was, even though we had communicated via Skype prior to me leaving Germany, he had returned to his home city and is getting engaged to someone chosen by his mother. I was warned not to travel to his home city as I would not be safe.
When I contacted him he denied where he was and it was not until I told him that I was in Egypt that he told me the truth. He said he had to marry as it was expected of him but I will forever be his true love. He said that if I wait a few years he will find a way for us to be together, I told him I did not want this and would sever all contacts. I initially did this by deleting him from my Facebook friends list but after a few days I tried to contact him by text and was told in no uncertain terms that we must be quiet for a while. I miss him terribly and long to be in Egypt with him, I know this must remain a dream and I should try to forget him.
I am still living with my English Boyfriend but he is very suspicious of me, I think he knows something went on. Luckily I am very good at manipulation so have convinced him that it is in his head. The only good thing that came out of my covert visit is that I have made friends with a lot more Egyptian guys who just want on line fun and maybe the occasional visit which I think will suit me fine, one of which is a pilot for Egyptian Airways so he must me more trustworthy.
I know I may come across as a heartless bitch and I wish I could stop talking to these guys but they are so much fun compared to the reserved Europeans after all I will only live once.
For now
Goodbye
lynn (not verified)
I think you are spinning us
Mon, 2013/01/07 - 16:34I think you are spinning us yarns.I think you are winding us up ,sorry dont believe what you are saying.
Isis (not verified)
Told you so!
Mon, 2013/01/07 - 21:33I hate to say it but you were warned and warned and warned and ignored all the advice posted on this forum. What more can I say?
You still haven't learned from the experience and will continue to be hurt and end up financially depleted - good luck!
Isis (not verified)
Egyptian pilot
Tue, 2013/01/08 - 21:22Just noticed that one of your conquests was an Egyptian "pilot" - that's a new one as they used to all be "engineers"! I think they saw you coming ...
Anonymous (not verified)
I am so confused at the
Tue, 2013/01/08 - 05:31I am so confused at the momement
I have written before about how my Egyptian boyfriend always gets bad moods and everything a few weeks after I leave him.
Everything was sorted and good and when I was there in November we sorted lots of things and agreed we would marry when I next go there which was meant to be February. He even became more public about our relatioinship, not that he hid it anyway. Also due to my circumstances and his we agreed we would see if we could get him to come and be with me in the UK, until we were in a position to be in Egypt together.
From our discussions together he told me why he was in such bad mood, it was to do with problems at home with his family over the family property and they were keep arguing.
At the start of last month he returned home to try and sort things so that his family would be happy and for us to be able to move forward. He was there less than a week when he told me he was leaving as he had big fight with his brothers.
Since then he has been so sad and mad. Everything I say or do is wrong. He says he feels alone and that he lost everything. The problem now is that he says he wants to marry me and have a family with me, but that we need to get a flat there first. I dont know how he thinks we can do this as he has nothing and me very little at the moment. He says he is still happy to come and be with me in UK but this is right way to do things have home, marry and then family. That this is what we agreed first, which he is right but my circumstances changed which I told him at least 8 months ago and thought he understood.
When I tried explain to him that I want same and that we will have a home there in the future, but I could not do it straight away he just got sad and then did not want to talk about things. Afterwards each time we spoke he would be so much hard work and sometimes even get mad.
Feeling frustrated and wanting to sort things I spoke to a friend there who is living with her husband there to try and see how I could sort things and get him to understand.
Of course this did not go down well with my boyfriend that I was talking about our private things, which I know he is right about but it was just to help us.
Anyway now he is just mad and thinks I am talking to everyone and that everybody is saying bad things about him. He has got so mad that he has told me that he loves me but I have broken all and never listen to him or respect what he says and that maybe we should see our own lives.
I do listen to him and understand many things and its not out of disrespect that I talked to others, it was just because he was not talking much and I wanted to find away to sort things. He has always asked me to keep our things private and not talk to anyone as there are always people out there that want to cause trouble. So in this respect I did not listen I suppose. He is being so paranoid about everything.
I dont get what is going on with him as it was all so nice and we were both so happy and now he has changed and I am not sure how to sort this. Any advise as to what I can do to solve things or to get through to him or why he is being like this would be great.
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