A word of caution for female tourists visiting Egypt: be careful of the many of the men working in tourist areas in Egypt.
Although the vast majority of Egyptians have a high sense of honor and good conduct, it seems that tourist areas seem to attract a relatively high concentration of people with lax morals, who would exploit tourists in many ways. It can manifest itself as persistent aggressive begging, peddling cheap goods, charging 10X the normal prices for services and goods, and what this article focuses on: exploiting female tourists.
Looking at the bulk of the comments on my notes on compulsory army service in egypt they are mostly from non-Egyptian women who married (or intend to marry) an Egyptian man, and army service has become an obstacle.
So, once you here the word "habibti" (meaning "my love" in Arabic), and before you call him "Habibi", let alone go down the marriage route, read on below for more information.
The exploitation happens in many forms, but is normally centered around one of the following:
Easy and Free Sex
Many tourists come from countries where sex is more freely practiced outside of marriage. Youn g Egyptian men working in tourist areas who
are not married see this as an opportunity, and are met with acceptance from the female tourists.
A source for Money
Many Egyptian men who practice this scam view the "wealthy" tourist as a source of income. They keep asking their "girl friend", "fiance" or "wife" for money for various excuses, just like a professional scammer would play a confidence game on a victim.
An Opporunity for Immigration
Some of those men want to get out of Egypt, and see their marriage as a way to gain residence and citizenship in a Western country. The economy in Egypt has been stagnant for decades, and poverty, lack of opportunity and the high cost of marriage lures some youth to trying these tricks.
Why it works?
There are several factors that work in favor of the Egyptian scammers here.
One factor that helps is that most Egyptian men look desirable to Western women, being of darker complexion than their compatriots. The fact that the foreigners are white blonds work in making the women attractive and desirable for Egyptian men.
Another factor is that the woman is coming to the tourist place to have a good time. It may be a break from stressful work or study, or perhaps a past relationship. This helps blind her to what is happening.
Yet another factor is the cultural differences which also create temporary blindness.
Moreover, those workers being away from their village or city of origin, where they would be observed by their extended family and friends tend to make it easier for them to engage in sexual relationships and scams without being scrutinized by acquaintenaces, and no stigma is attached to these behaviors.
Finally, the scammers have perfected their techniques over the years, and are very skillful at what they do.
Blacklists
Blacklists have emerged on the internet, to warn potential female tourists from known exploiters. These have all the faults of user contributed content on the internet in that they can be innacurate, biased, or even rigged by rivals or pranksters. However, in the absence of any other information, they can be useful, provided they are taken with a good deal of skepticism and research and common sense applied.
- An overview article on what a "black list" is, at Arabia.pl.
- Dezy House: Blacklist for Hurghada, in English.
- Dezy House: Blacklist for Sharm El Sheikh, in English.
- Wanted List of Egypt.
- Egyptian Blacklist on Topix.
- KunstKamera blacklist.
Happens everywhere, not only Egypt
Before someone gets the impression that Egypt is a cesspool, and Egyptians are crooks, let me say it is neither.
The problem above is not limited to Egypt by any means. Any country where tourists come in to spend money has its share of exploiters. The above black lists have a Turkish one, and a Tunisian one, and there are lots of stories about French, Italian and Spanish men exploiting women tourists as well.
Of course, there is also the Russian bride fraud targeting well to do men in the West.
So, the problem is universal, although this article focuses on female tourists to Egypt.
Final Thoughts
There are many non-Egyptian women married to Egyptian men happily, so over-generalizing from the cases mentioned, or from workers at tourist resort is wrong. Chances are you will be happy with an Egyptian as a husband if you met him in a more natural settings, e.g. while studying or working, and getting to meet his family as well.
The "artificial" environment in resorts, being on holiday, and surrounded by some scammers lend itself to the disasters described.
So, beware ...
Further Reading
- Marwa Rakha: Relationship Warning: Do not get involved with Egyptian Men (also here).
- Global Voices: "Beware of Egyptian Men" says Canadian Embassy, also by Marwa Rakha.
- Trailing Grouse: Egyptian men marrying women for money.
- Yahoo Answers: Egyptian Men marrying foreign women to get out from Egypt.
- Sex, Sun, Stupidity and Gigolos.
- Amy Robson: n English girl who keeps falling in false love with Egyptian men (she finally returned to Britain).
- Someone searching on KunstKamera: for Honest Egyptian Boys?
- List if sites on Romance Fraud in German, and other languages.
- A movie documentary in the making on holiday romance, specially Hurghada.
- Female Sex Tourism on Wikipedia, has lots of links to extensive articles. While Turkey is listed as a major destination, Egypt, Tunisia, and Morocco are listed as "minor destinations".
- An article from a Canadian perspective: Sex tourism in full boom. Jamaica, Barbados, Dominican Republic and the Caribbean are the major destination for Canadian women.
Comments
Anonymous (not verified)
i have to say that i
Mon, 2009/05/04 - 10:41i have to say that i understand the prejudices about egyptians somehow but there are so many different ppl there. i have lived in egypt most of the last 4 years. the guys in the tourist areas like shram, dahab or hurghada indeed are looking for ething that is wearing a skirt. but did u ever see the foreign girls, specifically from russia, they are there for holidays and they want to have their fun as well. i met a hell of girls that told me they just wanna have some fun with an egyptian. and of course most of the egyptian boys have never been out of egypt and they have never seen 'normal' european girls. lots of them really do think we are like this.and also i understand some of them if they are trying hard to marry a foreigner just to get a visa. u dont know anything about egypt laws and regulations.its a very tough country. and if u have no chance to get out of it wihtout a marriage u will try ething to do that. especially if ur not or not well educated and have no chance of a future in egypt. i also think every girl who gets into relationship too quickly and too easy its also her fault. me, myself i am in a relationship with an 27 years young egyptian since 4 years and married since half a year. i lived for a very long time there and i got to know him, his life, family, culture, religion step by step. this is the most important thing. to get too fast into it. there are for sure millions of details to discuss and talk about. it takes more efforts than a relationship with one of the same country and cultural background. but in the end, it was the best decision i could have done. we are still very happy and he is the love of my life.
Anonymous (not verified)
I agree with you.I`ve read
Fri, 2009/05/29 - 15:44I agree with you.I`ve read some real horror stories on this site! I went to sharm and met my man there and to begin with only talked then had months of telephoning, getting to know him and doing all the things i do with an english man - laugh, discuss and argue! As men go they`re basically the same. Culture and respect, understanding the differences our society creates in shaping us as nationalities is the work. I love him and I know he loves me. He doesn`t have much emotional experience so it can get a bit immature when he throws a paddy! I`m not an old hag, in my thirties, we are just a normal looking couple when we are together. My best friend is half egyptian and even she`s surprised we`re still going one year on. yeah there are casanovas but so are the guys who work at seaside resorts all over england and on the fairgrounds! No excuse for not thinking things through, using common sense and if you through it out the window well your in for a bumpy ride!
Natalie (not verified)
I have read all these stories
Wed, 2009/08/26 - 18:55I have read all these stories so went to Luxor with my eyes wide open. On my second week there I met a man I felt I realy liked, Ahmed, he is 33 and as far as I know unmarried. He took me to the home he shares with his brother, his parents are both dead, he also took me out several times to show me sites and he treated me like a lady. He asked for nothing. I have been home now for three weeks and at first he texted and emailed telling me how fond he had grown of me, no silly words of love, just fondness, yesterday he emailed to tell me he needs money to have an operation on his knee, and without it he cannot work for much longer. I don't know what to do, the op will cost him 3000 le, which he says he has not got. Do I believe him and send the money or do I ignore it? from Natalie, Bournmouth, England, aged 42.
Khalid
Typical scam ...
Wed, 2009/08/26 - 19:30This is a typical scam.
You are older than him by a considerable number of years.
His parents are most likely still alive, but live in some other village. The brother is probably another worker who room-shares with him.
There is no operation. There is nothing to do.
He is milking you for money ...
If you want to be sure, ask someone else who is going there to check if he has a knee problem or not.
Natalie (not verified)
Thanks Khalid, I felt it was
Wed, 2009/08/26 - 20:25Thanks Khalid, I felt it was a scam. so nothing will come from me. If I had not seen this site I would have believed him. Natalie.
Jan (not verified)
Operation
Fri, 2009/08/28 - 13:53Natalie, do not send any money to this man love, if he was decent he would never ask, hope it doesn't put you off Egypt, it's a wonderful place to visit.
I am there now in Luxor, and having a laugh every night watching the men chatting up the English ladies, most laugh it off, some take it serious. Thats life. From Jan in Yorkshire UK.
Sadie (not verified)
Isn't it possible that this
Thu, 2009/05/28 - 07:38Isn't it possible that this can work both ways? I met a stunningly beautiful boy in Egypt over New Year and had the best week I can remember having.
We have maintained contact and I have been back to visit him. I do think he is a little extreme in the language he uses: a bit much my heart, my love etc, but it's part of his charm and I'm not exactly taken in. We have wonderful sex, we have a laugh, and we actually have a surprising amount in common, considering I'm a little protestant feminist white girl.
Of course we are wildly different and I love my life in the UK and am not even considering upping sticks and moving to marry him in Egypt. But it's an insight into a different world and I'm intrigued - and I'm learning a lot.
The bit that confuses me about this site is why it is so one-sided. Can't both parties be kind of 'using' each other. Aren't most relationships manipulative in some ways anyway? A bit of loving from a gorgeous young Egyptian is going to do any 50-year-old getting over a marriage the world of good. Believe me. Why can't it be an empowering thing for women rather than a disempowering one? As long as you maintain a certain level of control, keep a certain amount of control over your heart, it can work out perfectly for both.
Anonymous (not verified)
very well said, I agree
Fri, 2015/01/02 - 15:19very well said, I agree
AnnLeary (not verified)
To Sadie.
Fri, 2009/05/29 - 13:27Sadie you are right, it can be an empowering thing for a woman who needs cheering up in her life, as you say, so long as she keeps control over her heart. I am married to an Egyptian doctor and I myself am a doctor and sociologist, we went recently to Luxor and met many of these women, I noticed most of them came from the north of England, and were divorced from their selfish 'control freak'(their words) husbands for some time. Although not stupid, these women were simply educated, and very naive types. They do seem to be aware of what goes on in these holiday resorts, yet they still want to trust and believe the young man they are with. It is too easy to have your head turned by these handsome young men, and be wary of the lovely words they use, my husband Khaled says all these nice words come from romantic Egyptian songs, so not from the heart at all. I can see by your writing that you are intelligent so enjoy, be empowered, but do research, it is fascinating. Ann Manchester UK.
Anonymous (not verified)
I have just come back from a
Fri, 2009/06/12 - 09:27I have just come back from a lovely holiday in Luxor, I have been there about 5 times now, I met up with two women, one from Yorkshire and the other from manchester, both heart broken over being conned by their Egyptian boyfriends, these women were not unintelligent, yet they gave thousands to their so called husbands to buy property in the husbands name. Both women were in their 50s and both young men in their 20s. One of the women sold her home in UK believing that she would live in Egypt for the rest of her life in Luxor, but the boyfriend told her to go back home he didn't want any more to do with her, she could do nothing because as far as the law there is concerned she gave him all her money as a gift. The other one found her boyfriend living with another foreign woman in their home when she got there. I feel very sad that this goes on, I hope lessons will be learned.
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