A word of caution for female tourists visiting Egypt: be careful of the many of the men working in tourist areas in Egypt.
Although the vast majority of Egyptians have a high sense of honor and good conduct, it seems that tourist areas seem to attract a relatively high concentration of people with lax morals, who would exploit tourists in many ways. It can manifest itself as persistent aggressive begging, peddling cheap goods, charging 10X the normal prices for services and goods, and what this article focuses on: exploiting female tourists.
Looking at the bulk of the comments on my notes on compulsory army service in egypt they are mostly from non-Egyptian women who married (or intend to marry) an Egyptian man, and army service has become an obstacle.
So, once you here the word "habibti" (meaning "my love" in Arabic), and before you call him "Habibi", let alone go down the marriage route, read on below for more information.
The exploitation happens in many forms, but is normally centered around one of the following:
Easy and Free Sex
Many tourists come from countries where sex is more freely practiced outside of marriage. Youn g Egyptian men working in tourist areas who
are not married see this as an opportunity, and are met with acceptance from the female tourists.
A source for Money
Many Egyptian men who practice this scam view the "wealthy" tourist as a source of income. They keep asking their "girl friend", "fiance" or "wife" for money for various excuses, just like a professional scammer would play a confidence game on a victim.
An Opporunity for Immigration
Some of those men want to get out of Egypt, and see their marriage as a way to gain residence and citizenship in a Western country. The economy in Egypt has been stagnant for decades, and poverty, lack of opportunity and the high cost of marriage lures some youth to trying these tricks.
Why it works?
There are several factors that work in favor of the Egyptian scammers here.
One factor that helps is that most Egyptian men look desirable to Western women, being of darker complexion than their compatriots. The fact that the foreigners are white blonds work in making the women attractive and desirable for Egyptian men.
Another factor is that the woman is coming to the tourist place to have a good time. It may be a break from stressful work or study, or perhaps a past relationship. This helps blind her to what is happening.
Yet another factor is the cultural differences which also create temporary blindness.
Moreover, those workers being away from their village or city of origin, where they would be observed by their extended family and friends tend to make it easier for them to engage in sexual relationships and scams without being scrutinized by acquaintenaces, and no stigma is attached to these behaviors.
Finally, the scammers have perfected their techniques over the years, and are very skillful at what they do.
Blacklists
Blacklists have emerged on the internet, to warn potential female tourists from known exploiters. These have all the faults of user contributed content on the internet in that they can be innacurate, biased, or even rigged by rivals or pranksters. However, in the absence of any other information, they can be useful, provided they are taken with a good deal of skepticism and research and common sense applied.
- An overview article on what a "black list" is, at Arabia.pl.
- Dezy House: Blacklist for Hurghada, in English.
- Dezy House: Blacklist for Sharm El Sheikh, in English.
- Wanted List of Egypt.
- Egyptian Blacklist on Topix.
- KunstKamera blacklist.
Happens everywhere, not only Egypt
Before someone gets the impression that Egypt is a cesspool, and Egyptians are crooks, let me say it is neither.
The problem above is not limited to Egypt by any means. Any country where tourists come in to spend money has its share of exploiters. The above black lists have a Turkish one, and a Tunisian one, and there are lots of stories about French, Italian and Spanish men exploiting women tourists as well.
Of course, there is also the Russian bride fraud targeting well to do men in the West.
So, the problem is universal, although this article focuses on female tourists to Egypt.
Final Thoughts
There are many non-Egyptian women married to Egyptian men happily, so over-generalizing from the cases mentioned, or from workers at tourist resort is wrong. Chances are you will be happy with an Egyptian as a husband if you met him in a more natural settings, e.g. while studying or working, and getting to meet his family as well.
The "artificial" environment in resorts, being on holiday, and surrounded by some scammers lend itself to the disasters described.
So, beware ...
Further Reading
- Marwa Rakha: Relationship Warning: Do not get involved with Egyptian Men (also here).
- Global Voices: "Beware of Egyptian Men" says Canadian Embassy, also by Marwa Rakha.
- Trailing Grouse: Egyptian men marrying women for money.
- Yahoo Answers: Egyptian Men marrying foreign women to get out from Egypt.
- Sex, Sun, Stupidity and Gigolos.
- Amy Robson: n English girl who keeps falling in false love with Egyptian men (she finally returned to Britain).
- Someone searching on KunstKamera: for Honest Egyptian Boys?
- List if sites on Romance Fraud in German, and other languages.
- A movie documentary in the making on holiday romance, specially Hurghada.
- Female Sex Tourism on Wikipedia, has lots of links to extensive articles. While Turkey is listed as a major destination, Egypt, Tunisia, and Morocco are listed as "minor destinations".
- An article from a Canadian perspective: Sex tourism in full boom. Jamaica, Barbados, Dominican Republic and the Caribbean are the major destination for Canadian women.
Comments
Mo Galal (not verified)
well..
Mon, 2011/01/24 - 18:46My girlfriend is Danish, we love each other, never thought about getting married for me to flee out of Egypt or anything like that, matter of fact I'd wish she's come and live here. I'm refusing the idea of doing something like that (Getting married) because I do want to prove to her that I love her so much that I wouldn't wanna do anything like this to take any possible advantage of being with her, but I will agree with you in plenty of what you said, many men who works in tourism here in Egypt would definitely seek that as a chance to get out and find a better life, but trust me this only works with young Egyptian men hitting on 45+ years old foreign women, I'd say to each lady who has over 20 years more in difference with her beloved Egyptian soul mate (That she think he is) to be careful, because all he'd want is for you to free him out. Egyptians are sincere and friendly by nature though.
Anonymous (not verified)
hey all . how is everybody ,
Tue, 2011/02/08 - 09:31hey all . how is everybody , i really like this report but i dontk now why she write all of that , this women write this report living here in egyp and she looking for man to marry , she write all of that for me :), you are really sick i told you from frist day , and how come i marry prostitute....
you attack me and attack your friends just becouse we said the true and i never told you i love you and i think i never will love stuped sick person like you....
about the money : she did not pay even for one cup of tea so i dont know why she said that and im sure 100% you have nothing you really poor from outside and inside.
but anyway it was my big mistake to know crazy women like that. i ask god to help you or if you want walahy i can help you like what i do always befpre and find good doctor for you, or leave egypt , i swear no body want you here and im sure you left your country and come to live here in so cheap place and camp coz no body need you there
im sorry everybody for what she write here but i swear she just ssick and she have nothing at all to do , she live in egypt and spend her time between disco and cofeshop. so i think she just try to be busy by attach ppl she attack me and 2 from our friends in facebook
anyway im really sorry for everywomen somebody use her from egypt or from any another country but i not men bad and not all good . any women have a mind to choice
Anonymous (not verified)
its so funny what you write
Tue, 2011/02/08 - 09:43its so funny what you write stuped ppl
most of you come here and live here and bothering us by your stuped culture , you always live like animals and you talking bad about the country helped you when you have no place to go
i hate my government to let stuped ppl come and live in this country like that , ur really so ceap like animals
Isis (not verified)
It's not so funny - Egypt needs all the help it can get now!
Sun, 2011/02/27 - 01:41If westerners didn't take an interest in your country and then travel to your country as tourists to inject billions of dollars into your economy to keep you in the lifestyle to which you are accustomed, then it would be a very sad state of affairs in Egypt.
Please note that enterprising local Luxor business people and also ex pats living in Luxor held an "Egypt Moving Forward" Festival yesterday showcasing tourism and Upper Egyptian culture in the hope of encouraging tourists back to Egypt. This is an honest effort to kickstart the Egyptian economy again. Ignorant and uniformed comments don't really help any situation at all.
Salina (not verified)
Egyptian men
Tue, 2011/02/08 - 10:14I came here on holiday and married an Egyptian. It is one of the best things that has ever happened to me. He is devoted, appreciative, never looks at other women, handsome, young and enthusiastic about life. I took a chance and even if it goes wrong I cannot say it would not be a good experience. Why not have a life abroad with someone young and gorgeous?
We have had long discussions about some of the men that do prey on women and it is true to some extent. There is a guy here who has done it 4 times now. You know yourself though if someone loves you and you love them. Dont forget there are a whole lot of horrible people all over the world.
Anonymous (not verified)
Khalid's Advice Needed
Sun, 2011/02/27 - 10:44I met an Orthodox Christian Egyptian on a date site. At first we were just friends and did not chat much. Suddenly this month he has been talking more and says he wants me to visit him in Egypt. Says he will pay for everything when I get there, and for me to just get the plane ticket. He lives in Cairo and is 20yrs old. I am 44yrs old and I've discussed the age difference and he says its OK with him and that age is not important to him. He has taken an interest in me now and claims that he loves me and now says he wants to get married. This is going a bit too fast for me as I had only intentions of just being his friend at the very beginning. He is a very sweet guy and so nice, but I just can't see myself married to such a young guy. We have seen each other on the web cam and he loves the way I look as I look very young for my age. He says I'm perfect for him and has not ever loved anyone online or in real. He is very anxious for me to visit him this spring. I have mentioned to him that I don't want kids as I have a 13yr old girl. He says that he never thought of having kids and will see my daughter as his own and be a father, brother, and friend to her. I just can't see myself with a guy so much younger, but he seems so nice, polite, kind, with all the conversations we've had. He seems so sincere that I'm not sure how to break it to him that I can't be with him, yet I kind of feel that I do. I don't know if saying good-bye to him is a mistake or not. I know in my heart morally its wrong and what can he possibly give me as I've been alone for over 14yrs raising my daughter on my own since she was a newborn. I am very independent and I've told him that, but he says he wants to make me very happy. He works as a Graphic Designer in an advertising agency. I have my degree in Graphic Design but I don't work at it. But I see this as the only thing that we both have in common and also his nice kind manners. I hate to lose him as a friend, but I just don't see how I can marry him. I live in the USA and I know he has mentioned wanting to live there someday. But, he has also said that he wants me to live in Egypt with him. If so where so is the scam? Because if he is wanting me to go to Egypt and live, he doesn't need me as a way to get to the USA. He did mention that he would like me to help work if he doesn't make enough money for us to live off of. Then previously in another conversation he had mentioned he would never allow his wife to work, so there is a contradiction in what he had said. If anyone especially Khalid, can give me some advice on this matter, I would greatly appreciate it. Thanks so much, and I've read all the comments here. This site has been very informative!
Khalid
Sounds like a scam
Sun, 2011/02/27 - 11:37Sounds like a textbook case for a scam.
You are 44 he is in his 20s. He says :"that is fine". He says : "I don't want kids". He has never seen you, yet he loves you, and wants to marry you.
Stay away from him.
Mary (not verified)
Thanks Khalid!
Sun, 2011/02/27 - 17:42Thanks for responding to my message, Khalid. I really appreciate it! I'm not sure what you mean by a textbook case for a scam, can you please explain what you mean by "textbook case"? And I know this does not really count, but we have seen each other on the webcam.
Khalid
All the signs of a scam
Sun, 2011/02/27 - 18:22I mean it has all the signs of a scam.
Age difference is the most glaring one. It is not like a few years, we are taking a decade, nearly two.
It is an online relationship that suddenly he decided that it flared up without even seeing you in person once.
Saying he loved you and wants to marry you, just like that.
Saying he does not want kids to appease your fears about that.
Saying he will love your daughter, ...etc.
This can develop on many paths, either you go there and have a good time, then he will ask for money for his dying mother, or an operation, or saying he has to go to the army and needs money for a bribe, or many other things.
Don't do it.
Isis (not verified)
Scamming on web cam
Sun, 2011/02/27 - 22:03Khalid's advice is accurate and I would like to add that because you can see someone on webcam it doesn't mean it is not a scam. That this man has said that he doesn't want children goes against all he has been brought up to believe in. Family is the nucleus of Egyptian life and every man looks forwrd to the day when he can have his own family - no ifs, buts or maybe's here i'm afraid. This man is telling you want you want to hear, even to the point of being a graphic designer so that he can lure you to Egypt and help you part with your money. The age difference is a definate give away here as well.
You would be wise to ignore him.
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