Canada

Life in Canada, weather, humor, and more

Canadian Humor: Top 10 Reasons to Live in Manitoba

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Top 10 Reasons to Live in Manitoba

  1. You wake up one morning to find you suddenly have beach front property
  2. Amusing town names like "Flin Flon" and "Winnipeg"
  3. All your local bands make it big and move to Toronto
  4. The only province to ever violently rebel against the federal government
  5. Hundreds of huge, horribly frigid lakes
  6. Nothing compares to a wicked Winnipeg winter
  7. You don't need a car, just take the canoe to work
  8. You can be an Easterner or a Westerner depending on your mood
  9. Because of your license plate, you are still "friendly" even when you cut someone off

Canadian Humor: Top 10 Reasons to Live in Ontario

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Top 10 Reasons to Live in Ontario

  1. You live in the centre of the universe
  2. Your $400,000 Toronto home is actually a dump
  3. You and you alone decide who will win the federal election
  4. There's no such thing as an Ontario Separatist
  5. Your grandparents sold booze to the States during Prohibition
  6. Lots of tourists come to Toronto because they mistakenly believe it's a cool city
  7. The only province with hard-core American style crime
  8. MuchMusic's Speaker's Corner - rant and rave on national TV for a dollar
  9. Baseball fans park on your front lawn and pee on the side of your house

Canadian Humor: Top 10 Reasons to Live in Quebec

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Top 10 Reasons to Live in Quebec

  1. Everybody assumes you're an ass
  2. Racism is socially acceptable
  3. The only province to ever kidnap federal politicians
  4. You can take bets with your friends on which English neighbour will move out next
  5. Other provinces basically bribe you to stay in Canada
  6. The FLQ
  7. Your hockey team is made up entirely of dirty French guys
  8. The province with the oldest, nastiest hookers
  9. Non-smokers are the outcasts
  10. You can blame all your problems on the "Anglo bastards"

Canadian Humor: Top 10 Reasons to Live in New Brunswick

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Top 10 Reasons to Live in New Brunswick

  1. You are sandwiched between the French Quebecers and drunken Celtic fiddlers
  2. One way or another, the government gets 98 percent of your income
  3. You're poor, but not as poor as the Newfies
  4. When listing the provinces, everyone forgets to mention yours
  5. The economy is based on fish, cows, and ferrying Ontario motorists to Boston
  6. No one ever blames anything on New Brunswick
  7. You have French people, but they don't want to kill you
  8. Everybody has a Grandfather who runs a lighthouse

Canadian Humor: Top 10 Reasons to Live in Newfoundland

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Top 10 Reasons to Live in Newfoundland

  1. The poorest, stupidest, drunkest province in Confederation
  2. If Quebec Seperates, you will float off to sea
  3. In the rare case when someone moves to the Rock, you can make them kiss a dead cod
  4. The economy is based on fish, seafood, and fish-related products
  5. If you do something stupid, you have a built-in excuse
  6. You understand the meaning of Great Big Sea's lyrics
  7. The work day is about two hours long
  8. You are credited with many great inventions, like the solar-powered flashlight and the screen door for submarines

Canadian Humor: Top 10 Reasons To Live In Nova Scotia

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Top 10 Reasons To Live In Nova Scotia

  1. The only place in North America to get bombed in the war... by a moron who set a munition ship on fire
  2. Your province is shaped like male genitalia
  3. Everyone is a fiddle player
  4. If someone asks if you're a Newfie, you are allowed to kick them
  5. The local hero is an insane, fiddle playing, sexual pervert
  6. The province that produced Rita MacNeil, the world's largest land mammal
  7. You are the reason Anne Murray makes money
  8. You can pretend you have Scottish heritage as an excuse to wear a kilt

Canadian Humor: Top 10 Reasons to Live On Prince Edward Island

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Top 10 Reasons to Live On Prince Edward Island

  1. Even though more people live on Vancouver Island, you still got the bigger bridge
  2. You can walk across the province in half an hour
  3. You were probably once an extra on "Road to Avonlea"
  4. This is where all those tiny red potatoes come from
  5. The economy is based on fish, potatoes, and CBC TV shows
  6. Tourists arrive, see the "Anne of Green Gables" house, then promptly leave
  7. You can drive across the province in two minutes

Canadian Humor: Americans have it easy ...

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Several years ago, I found this gem on Usenet. Someone was saying that they were moving to Canada, and they were asking where to buy electronics in Canada, via mail order from the USA or where.

Someone asked: I'm about to move to Canada shortly and I want to know where do Canadians go buy softwares and hardwares? Would you prefer mail order to buying it from the stores? For mail order, would buying from a US company be cheaper than buying from a Canadian company? Thanks for the info.

To which Brad Ball, in true Canadian humor (rather humour) replied:

Weather: More harsh weather

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Another cold spell, or rather more deep freeze. Temperature as I type this (Thursday 15 January) is -23 Celsius. With wind chill factor, it feels like -32, with risk of frost bite.When I was leaving work, there was this frost on the inside of the car's windshield. This is very annoying. Had to scrape it off with an old CD that I keep in the glove box for this purpose. I had this happen to me two years ago. It is on days which are very cold, and very sunny.

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